I've been meaning to write this for a long time now. I accidentally lost some (thankfully not most) of my old blog posts when I switched from wordpress to squarespace. A couple of days ago, mom asked me, "what happened to Clareifi? I can't find it anymore!?" I've got them saved mom. I told her. I just can't really get into writing. I still feel as if I'm not sure what I want to say. My sister told me once that even if I felt that way, that I should just keep writing anyway, because it's therapeutic. I read an article yesterday that offered similar advice... Be consistent, regardless of what you're writing about. Sure I could keep a private journal, but what if...? If I can share, and offer my perspective... What if it helps? What if it inspires? Is that worth sharing? Wouldn't it be nice to have a record of what was going through my own mind on a particular day and time in the past. That's what this is. It's good for me. It's a reflection of my thoughts. This is how it will be, on the day it started again.
I've been feeling a pull towards dad more and more. Not just dad, but also feeling like mom who is the sole caregiver needs to have some help. She's told me that she feels lonely sometimes, and that it's nice to have someone to talk to. That's why I'm making the plan... The plan to be there, to be close to them, to be there for them. They would be the first people to tell me that I shouldn't change my life - my family's life for them, but they're also the people that ever since the second that I was born have been there for me. They have never failed me, they have never let me down, they have always put my needs before their own. So why shouldn't I? I have the support of my wife & my kids. You see, we are happy. We know that we will be happy no matter where we are, as long as we are together.
So... Here we go. Another beginning. Another adventure. Another Chapter in our life... Let it begin.
On the day it started again.
I like to FaceTime dad because with his hearing aids, it's easier for him to hear me than it is when it's just a regular phone call.